My 100 Movie Moments

I recently finished Patton Oswalt’s book Silver Screen Fiend about his four year addiction to films (yeah, bro, “films” not movies). It was also part memoir about his comedy career in the 90’s, which I found pretty fascinating.

At the end of the book, Patton includes his collected writing about films. One of the pieces is 100 of his favorite movie moments. He was inspired by all of the AFI 100 best lists. I, in turn, was inspired by Patton to create my own.

These are the things that I just happen to appreciate. Some are classic lines. Some are lines you don’t even register after a first watching. Some are performances. Some are songs. Some are images. Some are recognizable and some are just favorites for me. But that’s the whole point of a list like this, isn’t it?

It was also fun to put together. I probably could have kept going but this is it for now. Enjoy!*

  1. Mikey kissing Andie in The Goonies
  2. “Was it too much with the ethnic slurs?” – Alan Arkin, So I Married an Axe Murderer
  3. “They know, man, they can smell it, sure as that fuckin’ dog can…” – Reservoir Dogs
  4. Alvy Singer lingering a second too long, watching Annie walk away at the end of Annie Hall
  5. “You got him?” “Yeah I got him.” “Take him.” – The Untouchables
  6. “You had sex! With my prom date!” – Appleby in Stealing Home
  7. “Well, then, it’d be back to the range for me.” – The Spanish Prisoner
  8. Bill Murray whispering to Scarlett Johansson at the end of Lost in Translation
  9. “They lock you in a room and throw away the room.” – John Lithgow in The Manhattan Project
  10. “These are entries to the Frito-Lay sweepstakes, no purchase necessary, enter as often as you like, so I am.” – Lazlo Hollyfeld in Real Genius
  11. “Are they all here?” “All but one.” “Well, I’m goin’ anyway…” – Glengarry Glen Ross
  12. “I don’t go out there saying I’m gonna beat this guy up, I’m gonna beat that guy up…” “Anything else, X?” “Yeah. Steve, don’t come yet.” – Singles
  13.  The friends going their separate ways at the end of Stand By Me, “See you around.” “Not if I see you first…”
  14. The skateboard sequence in 1950’s Hill Valley ending in Biff covered in manure in Back to the Future
  15. “Let me check your math on that.” – The Social Network
  16. The Narrator and Tyler Durden entering Lou’s Tavern to “Going Out West” – Fight Club
  17. “You think you can steal from us and just walk away?” “Yeah.” – Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight
  18. “If I’m wrong nothing happens. We go to jail, peacefully, quietly, we’ll enjoy it but if I’m right and we can stop this thing, Lenny, you will have saved the lives of millions of registered voters.” – Ghostbusters
  19. Dustin Hoffman crumpling up the registry and putting it in his pocket after writing his real name at the hotel in The Graduate
  20. “It says ‘no smoking’.” “No, it says ‘thank you for not smoking.’ As I am smoking, I don’t expect to be thanked.” – Love and Death on Long Island
  21. “She doesn’t even go here!” – Mean Girls
  22. “I’m the guy who does his job, you must be the other guy.” – The Departed
  23. “Really? You’re not aware that that’s a TLC song?” “I don’t even understand the reference.” – The Other Guys
  24. Mark Ruffalo in You Can Count on Me
  25. “We should have sat in the Marilyn Monroe section. I don’t think Buddy Holly’s a very good waiter.” “Which one? There’s two Monroes.” “No. That is Marilyn Monroe. That is Mamie Van Doren and I don’t see Jane Mansfield, she must have the night off.” – Pulp Fiction
  26. “See, I got mind control over Deebo. He be like, ‘shut the fuck up’ and I be quiet. Soon as he leave? I be talkin’ again.” – Friday
  27. “Hey, barkeep, I think Jobu needs a refill!” – Major League
  28. “Hey, keep in touch.” “No, I think we’re done here.” – One Day
  29. “Now go get your fuckin’ shinebox!” – Goodfellas
  30. “Yeah, you’re not hurting it, you’re just gently battin’ the bunny around and the bunny’s scared, Mike…” – Swingers
  31. “Time to musk up.” – Anchorman
  32. The full deleted Kevin Hart scene from The 40 Year Old Virgin
  33. “No, it’s not me.” – Kristen Wiig in first class in Bridesmaids
  34. Wooderson, Pink, and Mitch walking into the Emporium in slow motion to “The Hurricane” – Dazed and Confused
  35. “What did you tell them?” “Nothing they didn’t know already.” – Dead Poets Society
  36. The Museum sequence in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
  37. Emilio Estevez’s laugh after Anthony Michael Hall says “it went off in my locker” in The Breakfast Club
  38. “He didn’t fucking phone me from Heathrow but he phoned me… I’m not lying, Ted.” “Okay. Alright. Good luck tonight.” “Cheers.” – Sexy Beast
  39. Ed O’Neill in Wayne’s World
  40. “So if I just look suspicious on your customers’ property, under those heightened circumstances, you have the authority to shoot me?” “Correct.” “Wow. Alright, alright. How’d you get the gig?” “Oh, you know, they were hiring? It was only a two week course.” – Grosse Pointe Blank
  41. Private Joker hitting Private Pile so many times with the bar of soap in Full Metal Jacket
  42. Sean Penn in Milk
  43. “Malkovich malkovich malkovich…” – Being John Malkovich
  44. “I’m always home, I’m uncool.” – Almost Famous
  45. Walter and Donny simultaneously taking bites from their In-N-Out burgers in the Dude’s windshieldless car – The Big Lebowski
  46. “I would’ve taken a bullet for you.” – Dave
  47. “How could I know it was you? I mean what the fuck are you doing robbing your own house?!” – A Fish Called Wanda
  48. Naomi Judd’s hand signal to Val Kilmer at the end of Heat
  49. “Oh, I’m dead. I’m so dead they’re going to have to bury me twice.” – License to Drive
  50. “You know the, um, the song is called ‘Satellite of Love’ the Lou Reed song. You said ‘Shed a Light on Love’ but it’s it’s satellite.” “No, yeah, ‘Satellite of Love’,”  then Connell looks around and smiles, acknowledging what a hopeless liar he is,  “take care of yourself, Brennan.” – Adventureland
  51. TJ Miller in Our Idiot Brother
  52. “You didn’t bring me along for my charming personality.” – Die Hard
  53. “One man? One vote?” “One man! One vote!” “To free South Africa, ya dumb son of a bitch!” “Ya dumb son of a bitch!” – Murtaugh and Leo in Lethal Weapon 2
  54. The going-to-town sequence in Wet Hot American Summer
  55. “What did you have for dinner?” “Was it cocaine?” – Role Models
  56. Pootie Tang’s father getting killed in an accident at the plant – getting mauled by a gorilla – Pootie Tang
  57. William Fichtner controlling how offended he is when Jay Mohr says, “wait, you want us to sell Amway?” “It’s Confederated Products. It’s a different company. It’s a different quality of product.” – Go
  58. “Grimm, what’s she saying?” “I don’t know, Loomis.” “You know what she’s saying, Grimm, she’s saying flowers for the dead.” – Quick Change
  59. “That’s twice.” – L.A. Story
  60. “I would rather be with the people of this town than with the finest people in the world!” – Roxanne
  61. The Russians dancing to “Soul Finger” in Spies Like Us
  62. Jeremy Davies in Solaris
  63. “It… it was… soap poisoning!” – A Christmas Story
  64. “There are two ways we can do this.” “Yeah? What are they?” – Out of Sight
  65. “You stole from my kin.” “Who was fixin’ to turn us in.” “But you didn’t know that at the time.” “Well, I was borrowin’ it ’til I did know.” O Brother, Where Art Thou?
  66.  “Mr. Murphy are you saying you lied on your application?” “No! Well, yes. Just to get my foot in the door. Showing initiative and that, like.” “Mr. Murphy, you were referred to us by the office of employment, you didn’t need to get your foot in the door as you say.” “Cool. You’re the man, the dude in the chair. I am merely here.” – Trainspotting
  67. “What’s your excuse, Stu?” “Peer pressure, I’m far too sensitive.” – Scream
  68. Jeremy Davies telling Amy Locane “I love you” at the end of Going All The Way
  69. The boys driving home in Chuck’s car as the sun comes up to “No Name #3”Good Will Hunting
  70. “Fort Hancock, Texas, please.” – The Shawshank Redemption
  71. “You think KFC’s still open?” – Old School
  72. “Does Santa know you’re away from the workshop?” – Elf
  73. “Ray you’re chanting, I wanna kill everyone, satan is good, satan is our pal…” – The ‘Burbs
  74. “Aw, Ma, I love him awful.” “Gee, that’s too bad.” – Moonstruck
  75. “That is the worst idea I’ve ever heard in my life, Tom.” “Yes, this is horrible, this idea.” Office Space
  76. The tear in Bill Murray’s eye after Max says “I hope to see you again,” then flashes a peace sign, “after the fighting stops.” – Rushmore
  77. Scott Wood’s strip club in Buffalo ’66
  78. “Stay cool. Stay cool forever.” – Beautiful Girls
  79. Mr. Shush from Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead
  80. “detective… detective… DETECTIIIIIIIIIVE!” – Se7en
  81. “Sweet Disposition” in (500) Days of Summer
  82. “Hey Nanny, hey Grampy… I’m not a moron, you know…” – Weird Science
  83. “Oh, I’ll never leave Montana, brother.” – A River Runs Through It
  84. “Actually, I’m looking for a Batman number fourteen.” “That’s a serious book, man.” – The Lost Boys
  85. “I will be fine because I am shallow and self centered but you are… complex. You will suffer terrible anguish for the rest of your life.” – The Money Pit (RIP Alexander Godunav)
  86. Owen Klein in The Squid and the Whale
  87. “I want you to tell him, in this – in these words: ‘Get on the fucking phone!'” “I can’t say that.” “No, you can. Tell him to get on the fucking phone!” – The Insider
  88. The cab ride home at the end of My Dinner With Andre
  89. “I want my father back, you son of a bitch.” – The Princess Bride
  90. The birthday party invitations blowing away on the playground in Little Man Tate
  91. Bruce Dern in Nebraska
  92. “Human life means very little to me at this point in time. You see I thrive on misery. In the jungle, misery’s all you got but back here in the world, everybody wants everything to be nice and civil. Well okay then. Let’s be nice. Let’s be civil. And let’s drop those guns before I pull this trigger and change the way you feel about me… Now you cops must really think I’m as dumb as you look. Don’t you know that when a flashlight hits the cement, it makes a completely different sound than a revolver? Now let’s be good boys and do exactly as I say.” – Men at Work
  93. “Time of your life, huh, kid?” – Risky Business
  94. “Hey, mellow off, man.” – Better Off Dead…
  95. “Fuck me? Hey, Vonnegut, do you read lips? Fuck you.” – Back to School
  96. Paul Newman singing “Plastic Jesus” in Cool Hand Luke
  97. Henry Fonda in 12 Angry Men
  98. “You’re just feeling a little angry here, because you started to care about old Aaron, I can understand that, but… you know, love hurts, Marty.” – Primal Fear
  99. “Do you get the headaches? I get such bad headaches.” – Clive Owen, The Bourne Identity
  100. “Now about this pickle… we find ourselves in.” – Inglorious Basterds

* Putting this list together made me realize how into comedy and action I am. But also, this is clearly a very white male list. Frankly, I am a white male so, I still stand behind the choices. But, while I may not truly get it, I’m starting to appreciate the Hollywood diversity problem.

3 thoughts on “My 100 Movie Moments

  1. I love this list. I don’t have 100, but a few your list made me think of

    -“My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!” -“In a row?!”- Clerks

    -“Look at the size of that boy’s head- it’s like a orange on a toothpick”- So I Married an Axe Murderer

    “Here’s a good stick- to beat the lovely lady!”- The Quiet Man

    “I gave her my heart… she gave me a pen”- Say Anything

    “Grover, worst case scenario after graduation” “Ding. Jane moves to Prague. I spend the rest of my life with you idiots”- Kicking and Screaming

    The end of ET

    “-I’m afraid he’ll never make a boxer.”
    -“No aptitude for knowledge”- How Green Was My Valley

    When Russell shows up at William’s house at the end of Almost Famous. He asks if she’s here, Frances McDormand says “Anita?” Cut to Zooey Deschanel, making a cute, confused, head to the side gesture

    “Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood.’- Stand by Me

    The montage at the beginning of Up

    The wedding/wake in New Waterford Girl

    The lighter fluid scene in “Withnail and I”

    Annette Bening seducing Michael Douglas in “The American President”

    “You can’t dust for vomit”- This is Spinal Tap

    The final scene of “City Lights”

    Most of Miller’s Crossing

    -“The young lady with the Uzi. Is she single?”- Sneakers

    “Nothing like a midnight pee in the ocean”- Rocket Gibraltar

    The banshee in Darby O”Gill and the Little People

    “Cut his willy off!” The War of the Buttons

    “This isn’t where I left my car”- Eurotrip

    1. These are all great, too. I particularly like the Sneakers and Pulp Fiction quotes. I also left out:

      “Naw, man, I’m pretty fuckin’ far from okay” – Pulp Fiction
      “Wanna see me feed a mouse to my snake?” “Yes.” – Pulp Fiction
      “Gee I’m real sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.” – Better Off Dead..

  2. I love that moment in Almost Famous too. The delivery of that line… like he’s been waiting for him to ask him all night… Just perfect

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