All of My Damn Notebooks

Damn, I've got a lot of notebooks.

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On Forced Enthusiasm: I Wanted To Be A Millionaire

When the only requirement is, "Be happy!" I'm out.

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Waiting by the Side of the River for a Toaster Oven

"Wait long enough by the side of the river and you will see the body of your enemy floating by." It's either Sun Tzu or Rising Sun, either way, I like it.

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6 Procrastination Powerups!


Farting In Front of My Girlfriend

My girlfriend and I have been together for close to three years. I'd say that two years is a reasonable relationship length to let some defenses down. Well, whether it is or not, it was.


Ask The Asshole Commenting on Your Friend’s Facebook Status

Out of nowhere, The Asshole Commenting on Your Friend's Facebook Status brings you the truth you didn't ask for.


My Top 10 Key and Peele Sketches

To conclude my Key and Peele posts, I'm just going to list my favorite episodes.

The Music Videos of David Fincher

I like his movies but I didn't know until now how much I liked his videos.

5 Sketches That Made Me Feel Like Key and Peele Get Me

I miss Key and Peele but their new movie Keanu comes out this Friday.

It Was Just A Car

After having paid yet another parking ticket and after driving with the check engine light on for a week, I decided that it was time to get rid of my car.

My Girlfriend Doesn’t Like Baseball

At some point you let go of who you want your girlfriend to be and pay attention to who she is.

Pot And Me: An Acquaintance Story

I'm amazed that I was never a pot head. Growing up in the suburbs of upstate New York, I had shoulder length hair, wore Birkenstocks, and liked jam band music. Hell, I went to Phish concerts sober. Who does that?

My English Teacher’s Life Story Blew My Mind or: How I Got a 5 on My AP English Exam

In high school, I worried about what I thought was my life. Meanwhile, my teacher had lived a hell of a life I never knew about.

Terry’s Present

The summer after third grade, my parents hired a contractor to do some work on our house. I learned a lot about adults that summer.